Paul Drake

Name: Paul Drake (Played by Rights)
Position: Research Assistant


Honor Student: 6 (+1 in melee while using a sabre)
"I've Temped For This": 4
Perfectly Normal Office Job: 1

Pawns (You start with 0 pawns)




  • Thomas A. Swift's Electric Rifle — +1 to Honor Student rolls when in use in combat


  • Ever-Present Coffee Mug — This insulated mug provides Paul with his doses of not-falling-asleep-and-dying throughout the day. He suffers a -1 to all rolls if he doesn't have it.


  • Homo sapiens: Immune to the effects of titties or seduction by female opponents or team members. (See Hooks)
  • Look at my Resume: Paul actually went to college. Surprise surprise. Granted, a BA in philosophy isn't actually that useful. +1 to sanity checks.


  • Homo sapiens: -1 to all rolls against the effects of seduction by attractive male opponents or team members. -1 to dealing with anybody with homophobia unless a successful 'hide orientation' roll is made. (See Perks)
  • What Color is Taupe Again?: Paul is the worst homosexual ever. He has no sense of color theory or reasonable fashion. Tsk tsk.
  • Cheaper than Zoloft: Paul can't stop stealing shit, wherever he goes. Pens, paper clips, sugar packets, even batteries.


Meet Paul.

"Hi. I'm Paul, Paul Drake, I'm here to fill in for…"

Paul is that guy whose desk you pass every single day of the week and never stop to notice him. He bounces from site to site, picking up the slack when researchers die or need some help for a bit. While he doesn't do much, he keeps things from melting down entirely by making sure papers get to where they need to go and cleaning out the dead's desks when they've been reduced to gristle and mush. His tie's nice, but plain, he wears the same plain business shirts every day, he only owns two pairs of slacks…

If he didn't occasionally pick up a boyfriend or get caught in a 252 zone occasionally, you would never even notice that he's gay.

Certainly doesn't change the fact that he's a little boring.

But, like any company temp, Paul deals with all the chaos and the weirdness of the Foundation the only way he can. By playing tetris online and occasionally making coffee for higher-ups so he doesn't get fired.


Paul has recently been promoted to an actual working position as a research assistant with SCP-336. Oh jesus.

He actually feels kind of awkward, as well, and is tyring to re-develop his intelligence and physiology he used to sport.

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